Mr. Blackwell’s Fabulous Fashion Independents of 2004
Nicole Kidman, Natalie Portman, Barbara Walters, Kate Winslet, Annette Bening, Oprah Winfrey, Scarlett Johanson, Gwen Stefani, Teri Hatcher, Jennifer Garner
"From a movie legend to television favorites to rock divas to press-hungry "it" girls, 2004 was a mind-boggling mix of The Bad, The Sad, and The Downright Ugly."—Mr. Blackwell
Dear All-
Welcome to my annual merry-go-round of Wardrobe wrecks, Designer check and the women who fell under a Fashion hex-—the 45th ANNUAL WORST DRESSED WOMEN LIST. Without question, this was the year of the "Wardrobe Malfunction," although what was considered the biggest fashion faux pas of the year Janet Jackson’s Super Bowl peekaboo flash was a total Tempest in a Teapot as far as I’m concerned. If you really want a stylistic scandal, look no further than the Ten Terrors "gracing" this year’s List. From a movie legend to television favorites to rock divas to press-hungry "it" girls, 2004 was a mind-boggling mix of The Bad, The Sad, and The Downright Ugly. Narrowing down the potential candidates to a manageable Ten was almost as difficult as trying to pronounce "Meet the Fockers" without offending Grandma. Next to impossible, indeed .
Before the fashion fatalities are revealed, let it be said that the finalists in my Society of Style-Free Shame won their place in WORST-DRESSED infamy purely on the basis of their overall wardrobe or lack thereof. They may have talent to burn, but in this case, it’s their wardrobes that should be reduced to ashes. Of course, in this wasteland of taste, 10 Best-Dressed Women also emerged like shining stars on a rain-soaked night, hence my Fabulous Fashion Independents List, which has been celebrating glorious women for 45 years as well. Take a tip from these Divas of Design the next time you need instant inspiration.
Fashion flip-flopped all over the place in 2004. Color was back in a big way; bling-bling was bigger than ever, while retro femininity also (thankfully) figured in the fashion landscape.
Everyone wore sunglasses (sometimes even in daylight), sportswear was de rigeur, and boots, bangles and brocade brimmed to the forefront once again. 90’s minimalism was finally laid to rest, while low-slung jeans, masochistic midriffs and neo-gothic no-no’s are finally on their way out. At least we can be grateful for that!
Here’s hoping 2005 takes the ultra-feminine look to new heights. Elegance, classicism and restraint are never out of style. Neither is a good 3-way mirror. It’s obvious the 10 WORST DRESSED WOMEN of 2004 should have invested in one before they left the house. After all, in this fashion-focused world we live in, dressing well is the best revenge.
With love,
Mr. Blackwell
The Worst Dressed Women of 2004
10.) Anna Nicole Smith: In Marilyn’s rejects, she’s a bona fide fashion scream — looks like a rag doll trapped in a wind machine!
9.) Meryl Streep: Forget "Lemony Snicket" — Streep packs the fashion punch of Jiminy Cricket! In dowdy glasses and lumpy tents, Meryl is "A Series of Unfortunate Events!"
8.) Paula Abdul: Let’s face it: Perky Paula’s a paint-by-numbers fashion foul — she dresses with all the restraint of a revved-up Simon Cowell!
7.) Britney Spears: What’s left to say about the new Mrs. Federline? She’s a "clothes encounter of the catastrophic kind!"
6.) Serena Williams: Courting disaster with every style-free serve, black leather at the Open takes a lot of nerve! From the Queen of Tennis to Fatal Fashion Menace — non-stop!
5.) Paris Hilton: Paris’s "designer" is obviously on vacation — this is one Hilton that should be closed for renovation!
4.)Courtney Love: Setting the decadent precedent was once her couture code — now she’s just Medusa stuck in a meltdown mode!
3.) ***A Tie Jessica Simpson and Ashlee Simpson: From gaudy … to grim … to downright frenetic these two prove that bad taste is positively genetic!
2.) Lindsay Lohan: Over-hyped and under-dressed. What’s happened to Lindsay? When it comes to fashion she’s in a schizophrenic frenzy!
and
1.) Nicollette Sheridan: In barely-there bombs she’s a taste-free pain — Let’s crown her the Tacky Temptress of Wisteria Lane!
RELATED READS:
Best Worst Dressed Lists of celebrity fashion misses and hits
Past Best Worst Dressed Lists
of celebrity fashion misses and hits:
Mr. Blackwell Worst Dressed List 2007
Mr. Blackwell’s Best Worst Dressed Women List 2006
Mr. Blackwell Best Worst Dressed List 2005
Mr. Blackwell Best Worst Dressed List 2004
Mr. Blackwell Best Worst Dressed List 2003
Mr. Blackwell Best Worst Dressed List 2002
--January 11, 2005
Published on January 11, 2005
